Tuesday, July 27, 2010

The Good, The Bad, and The Hungry.

A gooey mess of tobacco hit the floor of this hospital. This once pristine place had been devastated by the recent outbreak. The cop checks his gun as he walks down the narrow corridor. He felt something he hadn't felt in a long time. He felt actually guilt, remorse for what he had done to that man. That man that only wanted to see his wife one last time. He kept telling himself it was for the greater good though.

He heard a wet thud up ahead around the corner from him. He pokes his head around the corner to see a woman bleeding on the ground. She was a beautiful brown haired woman. It made the cop miss his now dead girlfriend. The killer stood about 20 feet away, a single zombie dressed in a doctors outfit. Half of his face was peeled off to expose muscle and bone.

Not wanting to alert any other fallen to his location he quickly moved to the zombie, snapping its neck. The zombie didn't react as the cop slowly let him fall to the ground. He quickly grabbed the undead and began to drag him to behind a nearby desk. As he relinquished his grip the zombie sunk his teeth into the cop. Having to bite his lower lip not to scream he had his own mortality flash before his eyes. Not liking this, he stomped the zombies skull into the desk, sending blood and brain every where. "Fucking prick!" He whispered as he checked his wound. He knew he would live, but had no clue if the virus would infect him. Was he one of the immune? He had no way of knowing, he began to search the rooms for some sort of bandages for his wound.

He quickly found some antiseptic alcohol and some bandages. He held his arm over a sink and poured the burning liquid over his still bubbling wound. The skin around the bite was already black and dead. He dried the wound and wrapped it with haste. He then began to investigate the rooms some more. He had came here to look for any medical supplies he could find. He had a headache that made it tough for him to focus. Tough for him to see the enemies before him. It strained his thoughts and actions, so he had to take care of it.

After 20 minutes of searching, and passing hundreds of dead bodies. He found what he was looking for. He took 4 pills and put the rest in the bag on his back. Now if he could only find some some food he would be ready to go to the police station. He jumped as he heard someone pounding on a door ahead of him. He ran to the door and listened on it. He didn't hear the normal sounds of a zombie. The hard wet thud of their decaying flesh hitting something hard. So he felt brave enough to whisper in between the banging. "Who is in there?" The cop asked, the banging stopped for a few minutes. The seconds hung in the air as the tension raised. No other sound could be heard in the small hospital, this was a good sign he thought.

"My names is Charlie," The door said. "and I cant get this door open." The door locked from the outside, but he saw no key. "Wheres the key?" The cop spoke as he struggled with the door handle. "My mom had it, she was going to try to find more food." Charlie said. The cops heart sank as he realized that the boys mother was none other than the beautiful brown haired woman he just saw dying in a pool of her own blood.

Not knowing how to handle this he did the only thing he knew to do. He reported the news as he saw it. "Your mother is dead son." He said coldly as he heard the child start sobbing. "Look I didn't mean for it to come out like that, I just I don't know how...." He stopped as he realized the key must be on the mothers body. "Ill be right back." He said, almost apologetically as he jogged towards the fallen body. He knew it would rise soon, so they'd have to be quick. He fumbled through the woman's pockets as found a key and a knife. It had the initials R.J carved into it. He took both items and inserted the key into the door. As he did a young boy jumped at him. The cop dodged and pushed the boy into the wall. "What the hell are you doing?" The cop asked indignantly as the boy stood up. He didn't appear to be infected so the cop was confused.

"I'm sorry, I was just trying to...." The boy said as he began to sob. Holding back the tears a bit he wiped his eyes and said, "Never mind I guess. Where is my mom?" He said as he looked at the cop, his green eyes shining like beacons under the tears. "Shes over that way" The cop said. "You cant miss her." He pointed. The boy ran off as the cop entered the room.

Inside looked like a normal hospital room. With the exception of two backpacks and a duffel bag sitting on the hospital bed. He quickly searched them to find they were full of supplies. One of the packs were filled with what looked to be school supplies. This was obviously the boys. The second was filled with various medical supplies, a very simple kit, but useful nonetheless. The duffel bag was filled with food, it looks like the boy and his mother raided some of the vending machines. The cop grabbed a water and a candy bar and zipped the bag back up.

"What are you doing?" The boy said as he entered the room again. "That's my stuff." He moved to the bags and began to put them on very clumsily. "The food and medical supplies are a great idea." The cop chuckled as he watched the boys efforts. "but the school bag may be a bit much." The boy looked at him curiously. "Where is my dads knife?" He asked. The cop was confused for a second before he remembered the knife he pulled from the woman's pocket. "Yea here ya go." He said as he tossed it to the boy. "Thank you." The boy said sullenly. "He gave it to me on his first day of work." he said as he pocketed the knife. The cop, as he finished off his candy bar asked, "What did he do?"

"He was a lawyer." The boy said sadly.

The Bumpy Road.

They say breaking up is hard to do. They are lying, breaking up is easy. But to try to suddenly get someone out of your mind that has been your everything, that is hard. Its been over for a long time not, but every so often I get the pangs of hurt and loss. In these moments is when I learn the most of myself. I am an idiot, I am angry, and I am bitter. I am envious of others success, all while not even trying to achieve my own. For the few people that somehow appreciate and like me, thank you. It takes a special type of person to like someone as horrible as me. I sometimes feel that people only tolerate me though. It may be that I am over thinking everything, but anymore I cant be sure about anything. My world is upside down, and I am not even sure what I believe anymore.

Here and now I will announce that I am going to try to be more positive. Negativity has gotten me in the whole I am in, and I am better than that. I can never forget my mistakes, but I want to be able to say that I am not that person anymore. For anyone that is around for the ride, I sincerely thank you. There are times when I don't feel like continuing the fight, but I am empowered by seeing you continue.

Thursday, July 22, 2010

Breaking Bad Season 1, Episode 1 review.

Breaking Bad is now on its third season and has had a lot of praise from critics. I decided to give it a shot because I like Bryan Cranston and wanted to see him in something dramatic.

The episode starts off setting the stage very nicely, Walter White (Played by Bryan Cranston) is a 50 year old high school chemistry teacher. He is a meek man, who seems incapable of standing up for himself. His wife, Skyler White (Played by Anna Gunn) is pregnant with the couples second child. Their first child, Walter White, Jr suffers from Cerebral Palsy and has speech and motor problems, for which he uses crutches. The White family seems to be a good group of characters with a lot of development potential.

Throughout the first half of the episode there is many mentions of Walters diminished health. He has a bit of a nagging cough and a cholesterol issue. This is to foreshadow the eventual reveal of his sickness. While working at his second job at a car wash he collapses, the scene cuts to him in an ambulance. I enjoyed this scene because throughout it, he is more concerned with his family worrying about him then his illness. He decides to keep his fall secret. In the hospital he learns he has terminal lung cancer. Even with chemo he only has about two years to live. This was awesome because it was like the show was putting a time limit on itself. I think more shows would be better off in this way.
Walter, now feeling close to the edge quits his second job at the car wash, leaving in a dramatic and awesome way that I am sure a lot of people could identify with. He goes on a drug bust with his brother in law, a DEA agent named Hank Schrader (Played by Dean Norris). The realization of his own mortality pushes him to seek a little excitement in his life. During the bust Walter is left alone in the DEA SUV, he sees a kid climbing down from the neighbors window. Intrigued he looks closer, it is a former student of his named Jesse Pinkman (Played by Aaron Paul). Hank tracks the escaped drug dealer to his house and explains a business proposal, he wants to start making and selling crystal meth. Presumably to leave something more behind for his family, who still don't know about his illness.

I wont go any farther into the episode, but this sets the stage and introduces all the characters. So far I love this show and it will be on my must watch list for sure.

As an afterthought I will be featuring more reviews and commentary on my page from now on, as this is new for me I will be looking for any feedback possible. So please comment, email (sexiestgeekyouknow@gmail.com) or get a hold of my on my facebook page. I'm also looking into setting up a twitter account just to get some more readers. If you liked this, or any other of my blogs please share it with your friends.

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

The Life and Times of The Patron Saint of Regret

As I see pictures I am flooded with memories. Some good, but most bad. Its days like these that I wish these memories weren't mine. Its days like these that make me think a lobotomy wouldn't me so bad.

I wish I could live life and just be happy, but this is a task that proves too difficult for me. I see your face before I go to sleep, and for a brief moment I wonder if I cross your mind. I know I don't, but the thought comforts me as my eyes close and slumber begins.

But as of late slumber hasn't came easy for me. I stay up until my mind literally cant think anymore. I'm losing my struggle with the memories that haunt me like ghosts of forlorn lovers.

I don't want you anymore, I truly don't. But then why wont your memory leave me be? Why must it persist like the cancer that it is? We don't work, never have, never will. Part of me wonders if that's my fault, then I take a step back and realize that I cant be blamed for everything. But that wont stop me from trying to blame myself for every pitfall.

We were in a constant struggle, always trying to one-up each other. Ours wasn't a productive relationship. The only place we could ever agree, also helped spawn some of my deepest pain. I see myself reflected in Brayden's eyes. Being told he is evil, no one can possibly understand what he is going through but me. He is me, the difference is its not too late for him. He will never be made better without my attention, I created the monster that lives inside him, and I want to help him defeat it.

Its days like these that make me consider my greatest love, and my greatest mistake. All in my head, never in front of me. I am sorry that I couldn't be the man I should have been then, if I could change it I would. The best I can do is promise that this wont happen again. I cannot create any more monsters until I slay the one inside myself.

Sunday, July 18, 2010

We all dun goofed- An argument against Net Neutrality

A scary realization came to me today. As I was still laughing about the Jessi Slaughter thing (If you don't know about it, youtube it) I thought "What if this were me? What if this were my sister and family?" That notion is a little scary to me. Anon was successful in making this girls (Yes girl, no matter what she does she is only 11) life a living hell.

This got me thinking of my stance on net neutrality. I was thinking about how I love that anonymous can exist, but its scary that something like this could happen. If your younger sister had this happen to you how would you feel? Even if "she deserved it" it'd still be terrible. We make allowances when our family fucks up that we wouldn't otherwise.

I also want to say that I do think the memes that arose from this are funny. But those are all from Jessi's father. Quite frankly he was angry and not that intelligent. Those are two things that, when combined, equal lulz for sure. But aren't the implications of this a little scary? What if you did something to earn the ire of Anon, would you want your family going through all this shit?

I am still for net neutrality, but stuff like this will be used against us. We will lose our online rights because a group of Internet Black Knights decided to make an example out of an 11 year old. Consider that next time you dun goof, or the consequences will never be the same.